I recently wrote this back to a girl on Myspace about approaching modeling agencies and the right ones, with the right photos, depending on your height.
I do not know how tall you are but make sure you are marketing yourself to the "right" agencies.
I think your photo on your comp is fine. Perhaps it could be a close up of just your face on the front, or crop that image to your hand. But the energy is there. I like that and print modeling agencies will.
If you are shorter than 5'8", you should be marketing your self to commercial print modelnig agencies, -it doesn't sound like you are doing this???
Because for these agencies there is no open call and submissions to agencies is based on "postal mailed submissions only."
So sure you could go to the open call, but honestly a print model or shorter model should not waste time with them. In the print modeling world you mail your photo to the agency and it could take a few submissions, but that is how it works.
So maybe you are not targeting the right agencies?
It is very rare you can walk up into a print modeling agency or talent and get a meeting and these agencies do not have open calls, and most of them can be found "word of mouth." They only want to see people who are serious, no flakey and who have great smiles and energy because the agencies clients are brands and services based around lifestyle models. There is even an agency in NYC called Lifestyles, there is also Gilla Roos, FFT Models, R&L models, Rick Miller Talent, Cunningham Escott and for "parts modeling" there is the Parts Agency. If the agency invites you to sign with them, or use their photography, or pay them or sign a contract, it's a scam.
No legit print modeling agency makes you do that. You freelance and pay your own taxes, and treat the modeling like a side business. Kind of like a handbag designer, you want your bags in many stores, not just in one to start off, you will limit your opportunities and in print modeling it is the same attitude.
I started freelancing with 4 agencies. All print. No one is jet set in the print modeling world, so give up the fantasy and be realistic. You might work one job a month but it will pay you well and it will be quality to start.
I would focus on making your photos show you interact with products, if you notice ads in Redbook, or O magazine you will see the ads I am talking about. Sometimes you see them in Glamour and Marie Claire as well. They are ads that involve models working with products that are not high fashion, more jewelry, and even tampons and household products. OR glasses or contact lenses, or hair products. Anytime you see a girl with a smile in a shot, she is a print model, and for print modeling, commercial print, the commercial part of the word means energy, personality and commercial products. Ask yourself, what products could I model, have a seen a girl similar to me modeling, and try to create some simple shots, even one or two based around products. Show your range from dresses to fitness clothing, but keep the makeup minimal and the styling simple.
I hope this helps.